07 October 2008

Operation Condor

Do I really need to keep reviewing every Jackie Chan movie I watch?

This is one of the best.

The fighting is beyond amazing and Jackie really goes for some crude humor in this one.

A+

Charlie Bartlett

Disturbingly funny at times. Oddly structured at others.

Anton Yelchin is a fantastic actor. Amazing. He plays whiney too much, and it's obvious in this film he can do so much more.

I'm not a fan of Kat Dennings, however and she does sing before the end of the film. Ugh. But, every moment with Hope Davis or Robert Downey Jr. on the screen is pure fun, so I don't care, too much.

Not much more to say. The film wants to be smart and it starts strong, but the writer and/or director eventually realizes he//she/they don't know much about teenagers or realistic dialog and just sort of slap together the last act of the film.

Lots of potential. It hits about 60% of what it could have been, which is still good enough, I guess.

First Strike

Also known as Police Story 4, this movie was made during the "can't film in Hong Kong because China owns it" period of Jackie's Career. It looks and feels identical to Mr. Nice Guy and Rumble in the Bronx, and feels nothing like a Police Story movie.

It is funny though.

And some the fights are fantastic.

Once again, Jackie is rescuing a girl from bad guys, exchanging one thing for another.

Once again, Jackie has a fight in a mall.

Once again, there is a misunderstanding and Jackie must fight people that will later become friends.

Does any of that bother me?

Hell, no. But this isn't his best work, either.

Mr. Nice Guy

The second best Jackie Chan movie you've never seen.

Seriously. Jackie almost gets cut in half by a radial saw.

Twice.

I'm not kidding.

And who can complain about a 2 million dollar stunt where they drive an earthmover through a mansion?

Fantastic.

Appaloosa

What?

Huh?

Why? Why did… how?

What did I…? How did this happen?

I'm still… it's been over 24 hours and I still don't know what the hell that was supposed to be.

How did Viggo and Ed Harris produce a film this bad?

And how is it getting a 76% on Rotten Tomatoes?

What happened? Did I watch the wrong print?

This thing was awful. AWFUL!!!

Look. One idiot review wrote:
Harris displays a quiet, unshowy confidence and a genuine fondness for the genre, capturing the horses and guns and saloon glasses in a soft, almost-sundown light.
Quiet? Unshowy? What? Every character talked to much, wandered around wondering where the camera was, and basically said EVERYTHING that they thought. Some scenes even duplicated others… with Ed Harris and Viggo talking about curtain patterns.…

…that's right CURTAIN PATTERNS…

…in an "unshowy" western.

Yeah. Okay.

Look. I seriously love both of these actors. Even Irons and Henrickson are a joy in most any other film. But this… this is… this is like watching someone who has just had brain surgery learn to play chess without a rulebook… or an opponent.

It's just absolute… absolute stupid.

Renee Zellweger is officially redundent in hollywood. She's inane, pedantic, and now… with whatever botched face crap she did to herself… hideous.

This movie is just about as bad as anything any of these people could have made. Why are so many reviewers drinking the kool-aid and telling me it's water.

Okay. I've spent too much time talking about this film. I hated it. Hate!!

On to another Jackie Chan movie. I need to get the bile out of my mouth.

06 October 2008

Clerks II

Um.

Funny.

But, still not a very good movie.

Sorry.

Kevin Smith is… um… well… not really the messiah everyone makes him out to be. He's a good writer, but a horrible director.

Sorry.

Police Story 2

I forgot that I had seen this before. Not as great as I remembered. Too much story (and bad dialog) and not enough fighting... although the park fight scene was fantastic.... so fast and creative... and... damn... what else can I say?

The film is generally not as good as the original Police Story, but a lot better than stuff like first strike.